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Game 1 Recap: Playoff Push Receives Heavy Blow (NSFW)

10/10/14

The Sabres playoff push was delivered a near critical blow as Thursday’s 3-1 loss to the Blue Jackets puts them in last place in the NHL.  The crowd seemed at times disinterested, perhaps unaware that the Sabres entered the game tied for fifth place in the NHL and third in the division.  Sabres players certainly noticed.

“Why the fuck did 18,100 fans show up to root for us to be terrible?” questioned returning WNY hero and Sabres captain Brian Gionta.

“How can this season be any fun at all when the fans and half the media are openly hoping that we fail?” added noted Not Maple Leaf Josh Gorges.

GM Tim Murray broke his vow of silence to weigh in: “If this team is as bad as it was last year, fans should be very concerned,” he said with a dour glare.  “Because that means that our young guys have made no growth, and no amount of Connor McDavids is going to make up for that.”  He then briefly walked away before returning and grabbing the mic once more.  “You fucking idiots.”

In other news, our Compete Level stat gets a makeover.  It will be Hits + Blocked Shots + PIM + (Takeaways – Giveaways) per game.  We will also be unveiling a Compete per dollar component once the team has played a few more games.

Competitors of the Night:

Tyler Myers – 2 hits, 3 blocked shots, 2 PIM, 3 takeaways, 1 giveaway.

Nick Deslauriers – 6 hits in 6:55 of ice time.

Enigmatic Euros of the Night:

Matt Moulson – No hits, blocked shots, PIM, or takeaways.  For some reason played less than 15 minutes, because Nolan.

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