That Time I Met Matt Moulson’s Mom
One of my mini-pack games during the 2010-2011 season was this Sabres – Islanders game in which I sat in the Richard H. Zednick Memorial Decapitation Corner otherwise known as the glove-side corner where the opponent shoots twice. This was right after the Penguins and Islanders had brawled so I was in rare form, even though I was sitting there with my mom. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy they beat the snot out of the Penguins, but I sent a number of epithets their way anyway because hockey. I love sitting on the glass because I know that the players can hear me, even if they pretend otherwise. I mostly focused on their goon squad, players like Haley and Konopka that only see five minutes a night, but I know I wasn’t particularly discerning about who I insulted.
At some point, my mother, probably trying to save face, started talking to someone behind us, a somewhat uncomfortable older woman in an Islanders scarf who looked like she belonged teaching high school physics instead of sitting at a hockey game in Buffalo. She eventually told us that she was one of the players’ mothers and when pressed further told us for #26. My mother turned to ask me who that was and I, like a jackass, said Thomas Vanek because the Islanders were as bad then as we are now and I had no goddamn idea. She said Matt Moulson, and I actually knew who he was then even though he was barely a recognizable player, so maybe that saved me a little, but probably not.
When Grabner netted his game winning hattrick goal halfway through overtime, I’ve never seen anyone who stayed for an entire game book it out of their seat as fast as Matt Moulson’s Islanders-scarved mother did then. So welcome to the team Matt Moulson! And Matt Moulson’s Mom! (I’m sorry.)